THE PRACTICE HANDBOOK FOR THE DISTRICT SERVING ONES
SERIES FOUR
SERVICES FOR SAINTS OF ALL AGES
Message Six
Sisters Service
Rom. 16:1 I commend to you Phoebe our sister, who is a deaconess of the church which is in Cenchrea.
John 12:2 Therefore they made Him a supper there; and Martha served, but Lazarus was one of the ones reclining at table with Him.
THE IMPORTANCE OF THE SISTERS
IN THE CHURCH LIFE
It is very clear that the brothers and the sisters are of two categories. The Lord is the source of all things, including us human beings, but in a practical, human way mothers are the source of mankind (1 Cor. 11:12). Without mothers, mankind would not be able to continue. In the same way, the sisters are the root, the source, of the church. Just as without mothers, mankind would be terminated, the continuation of the church, the corporate new man in God’s eternal purpose (Eph. 2:15-16), depends very much on the sisters. Human society and families depend more on the mother than on the father. In one sense we need a good mother more than we need a good father. A good father can do much good for his children, but what he does is not so practical and subjective. The real, secret, practical, and subjective help comes not from the father’s side but from the mother’s. If some children lose their father yet still have a good mother, they will still be able to be good children, but if they lose their mother, they lose their source of proper help.
Although the man occupies the higher position, in a secret, actual, practical, and subjective way the real situation of the family depends more on the female side. In the church it is the same. Regardless of how fine the brothers are, if the sisters are a problem, the church will be troubled, On the other hand, if there are no problems among the sisters, there will be no problems in the church. The sisters are the factors of calm and peace, and they can also be factors of trouble and turmoil.
As Long as the Sisters Do Not Think the Same Thing,
the Church Life Being Greatly Undermined
The problems in the church may come from the sisters because it is difficult for them to be of one mind. The church life may be greatly diminished by the dissenting mind of the sisters. The sisters love the church and are for the church, but they may still have the defect and shortcoming of not always thinking the same thing. This is a great frustration to the church life. If there is anything that the sisters need to deal with, it is their dissenting mind. All the sisters love the Lord; if they did not, they would not remain in the church life. Many of them have paid a great price to be in the Lord’s recovery for His church. Still, the church life has been hindered, at least to a certain extent, by the sisters not being of the same mind. The sisters do not hate each other, nor do they fight among themselves, but they simply do not think the same thing. There is no need to have a big problem or a turmoil; as long as the sisters do not think the same thing, the church life is greatly undermined.
Forgetting All Things Other than Christ and Praying
The two greatest problems in the New Testament related to the sisters are the dissenting mind and the gossiping mouth. These matters are tests to prove where we are. We may say that we are walking in spirit, but when we come together, we may merely talk. Our talk may not be sinful, but it may be too free, without any control, restriction, or limit. If the sisters would stop their talking and replace prayer, the situation among the churches would be different.
Whenever someone asks us concerning others, the best answer is, “I don’t know,” and the best ground for saying, “I don’t know,” is to actually not know. If we know something but say, “I don’t know,” we are lying. For our own protection it is better not to know many things. In our human fallen nature, however, we always like to know the affairs of others. When we come into someone’s home, we may like to look into certain rooms that we have not been invited into. This is dangerous. When we come into others’ homes, we should not try to know what is in the rooms. Even if we stay in a home for ten days, we should know only the guest rooms and the dining room. Then if someone inquires about the daily life of the hosts, we can say, “I don’t know,” and truly mean it. This will stop all kinds of it with gossip.
We need the Lord’s mercy and grace to learn the lesson to forget the things that we have heard. We should not have many things in our mind. In our mind we should have the Lord’s word of life (Phil. 2:15-16). Let us keep this word in our mind, forgetting everything else. (CWWL, 1975-1976, vol. 1, “The Crucial Function of the Sisters in the Church Life”)
THE FUNCTION OF THE SISTERS IN THE CHURCH
The Function of Being Submissive
In considering how the sisters should function in the church, the first lesson the sisters need to learn is to be submissive. In fact, the greatest lesson for Christians to learn is to be submissive (Eph. 5:21-22). Being submissive requires the abundance of life, for submission is the expression of life. There is a difference between submitting and being submissive. The sisters need to learn the lesson not only of submitting but also of being submissive. If the sisters can learn this lesson, the church will be strong and will be enriched. To be submissive, the sisters need to realize what their position and standing are.
The first function of the sisters is to be submissive. This does not involve the doing of any kind of work, but it is a real function. Being submissive is much greater than any kind of doing. If the sisters are submissive, they are doing the greatest thing in the world. This is the greatest function on the side of the sisters.
First Corinthians 11:3 says, “Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of the woman, and God is the head of Christ.” In this verse we can see the divine order.
If the church is to have a proper testimony in the universe, there should be no murmuring or complaining from the sisters. The sisters need to learn the lesson of being submissive. They need to have the attitude that, as sisters, they do not know what is wrong or what is right; they know only one thing that their position in the church is to be submissive. To decide what is right and what is wrong is not their responsibility or their position. The sisters are only in the position of being submissive.
The Function of Prayer
When the sisters learn the lesson of being submissive, it will be easy for them to take care of their second function-the function of prayer. The local church very much needs the functioning of the sisters in prayer. The function of prayer is not mainly on the side of the brothers but on the side of the sisters. Some of the members of the church need to constantly bear the responsibility of praying for the church, which includes praying for the elders and the responsible brothers.
If the sisters are submissive, the Holy Spirit will burden them to pray for everything related to the church. They will never criticize anyone in the church but will always pray for them. They will always be burdened to pray for all the matters and all the persons related to the church life. Whatever they realize, know, and understand related to the brothers and sisters, to the families, and to the spiritual situation of the church, they will turn into prayer. They will never complain, murmur, or criticize; rather, they will be submissive and always burdened to pray. The praying function of the sisters is based on and comes out of the real submission. This is what the church needs from the sisters.
In order to function in prayer, the sisters first need to be submissive. They need to take the position and standing of being submissive. This is absolutely different from the age of the world, from the course of the world, and from the flow, the tide, of the present century. The sisters must realize that the position the Lord has given them is to be submissive. I say again that if the sisters will fulfill this responsibility, they will have the life to continually pray for the church. The spiritual eyes in their spirit will be very keen to enter into the hearts of the saints and know their situation. Although the sisters will know the situation of the saints, including the elders, they should never say a word. Rather, they should bring all the matters to the Lord and call on the Head as the highest authority. The church will receive the greatest benefit from the sisters’ function.
The Function of Caring for the Affairs of the Church
If the sisters are submissive and carry out their function of prayer, it will be easy for them to realize what affairs of the church they need to take care of. Nearly everything related to the church needs to be taken care of by the sisters. The sisters need to take care of the brothers, the sisters, the children, the elderly saints, and the young people. In a family the wife and mother takes care of nearly everything. It is the same with the church. All the affairs of the church need to be taken care of by the sisters. The brothers are only the head, whereas the sisters can be likened to the body, which has many members and many functions. If the elders are inadequate in fulfilling their function, the reason is not that something is wrong them; rather, something is wrong with the sisters, because they did not take care of the elders well. If the sisters care for the elders properly, the elders will fulfill their function. The sisters should not complain that the work among the young people is poor. The sisters need to realize that it is poor because they did not take care of the young people well. If the sisters exercise the proper care, the work among the young people will be uplifted.
If the sisters take care of the elders, the young people, and the children, what a help they will render to the church! The sisters’ care will issue in the genuine building up of the church. Moreover, the sisters will be strong in spirit, rich in life, and bold in what the Lord has done through them. Then it will be easy for the sisters to function in the general meetings of the church, even though many brothers may be present. The sisters need to increase their functioning in the church meetings, but this depends on their being submissive, fulfilling their praying function, and taking care of the things that they need to take care of in the church. (CWWL, 1968, vol. 1, “Various Meetings in Los Angeles,” ch. 14)
SISTERS’ SERVICE IN THE CHURCH
We often find symbols of spiritual matters in physical things. We can use a woman’s position and service in a family as a symbol of the sisters’ position and service in the church. The church is God’s family. In a family there are parents and children, a husband and a wife, older ones and younger ones, and males and females. Women have a definite position in a family. On the surface a woman’s position may not be as manifest as that of a man, because the man is the head according to God’s ordination (1 Cor. 11:3; Eph. 5:23). Even though Western countries emphasize equality between men and women and promote the rights of women, men are more prominent than women. Nevertheless, whether she is only a wife or also a mother, the woman in a family bears a large and important responsibility, and her influence is profound.
In a proper family a woman should not be the head. As a good wife and mother, a woman needs to bear everything in a family; nevertheless, she should not make decisions and act on her own, nor should she represent the family in public. Rather, she should do things according to her husband’s command. A wife should do things with her husband’s consent and under her husband’s leading, even Though ninety percent of the household matters are in her hands. A family that is not like this is not a good family. A family in which everything needs to be done by the husband will be paralyzed.
At this time we would like to mention five major matters that we neglected in the past that require the sisters’ coordination for us to carry them out. Our present care for these matters is inadequate. The brothers are helpless in these five matters. The sisters must rise up to bear the responsibility.
Children’s Work
The first matter for the sisters’ service is the children’s work. Concerning the children’s work, within me there is truly a heavy burden. All the churches must have a children’s work. According to statistics, forty-five percent of the population of Taiwan is under fifteen years of age. This is roughly six million people. Many local churches have quite a few families with children. I estimate that there are about ten thousand children in the church in Taipei and about the same number of children in the churches in the rest of Taiwan. If we work with these twenty thousand children, they will all be young brothers and sisters after six to seven years. This is what the sisters should do.
Appointing a Few Serving Sisters to Take the Lead
In carrying out this work, we need to pay attention to a few principles. First, a number of sisters should rise up to lead the children’s work. A number of older sisters must receive this burden. The elders should also appoint three to six sisters to take up this responsibility.
The Sisters Bringing the Children to the Meeting
The sisters should also bring the children to the meeting. If a sister cannot bring ten children, she should be able to bring five. Every week the sisters should consider how to bring the children to the meeting. If the meeting place is inadequate, they can open their homes. The sisters are like nursing mothers who care for the children and pray for them. After the meeting, the sisters need to take the children home. All the sisters should give themselves to this service.
Training the Young Sisters to Be Teachers
We must use the young sisters to lead the children’s meetings. Two or three other sisters can assist them in teaching the children to sing. The church should train the teachers so that the young sisters learn to teach and lead the children. Some brothers also need to collect and write material for the children’s meetings. They should prepare material for the youngest group of children, for the children in the middle grades, and for the older children.
Opening the Homes for Children’s Meetings
The saints should open their homes for children’s meetings. When the children’s work is carried out in a good way, I estimate that there will be about three hundred groups with twenty-five to thirty children in a group. This is close to ten thousand children. This means that we will need several hundred places for the children’s meetings, Of course, we can use the meeting halls, but the number of meeting halls we have will not meet this need. We need many brothers and sisters to open their homes. It would be good to have three hundred meeting places for the children every Lord’s Day. How beautiful this service will be! And how much the Lord’s work will be propagated!
When the entire church is mobilized in this way, all the brothers and sisters will have an opportunity to serve. Some can open their homes, others can bring the children to the meetings, and still others can teach the children. When all the saints endeavor in one accord for the Lord’s heart’s desire, the profit will be immeasurable. This will impress the children that we are all for the Lord and are caring for them without compensation. Those who open their homes do not ask for money, those who teach do not ask for money, and those who transport the children do not ask for money. Instead of asking for money, the saints spend their own money to pay the expenses of carrying out the children’s service. As a result, everyone will be full of joy. Our conducting children’s meetings in this way will deeply impress the children from their youth. They will see people who live for Christ and who sacrifice for Christ, not caring for themselves. This is the ultimate benefit. Furthermore, the impact will unconsciously influence the relatives of the children in such a way that it will be easy to invite them to a gospel meeting. Hence, the children’s work is a major service.
Recovering the Dormant Sisters
The second matter for the sisters’ service is to recover the dormant sisters. The sisters should use every means possible to locate the dormant sisters. Some sisters will need to head this up. The five areas of service need to be headed up. The sisters who take the lead should form home groups with about eight to ten sisters in a group. As to when and where the home groups meet, each group can decide. Then the sisters can invite the dormant sisters to their homes and have a time of fellowship, have tea and snacks, and sing some hymns; in other words, the sisters can have a time of fellowship without formality. I believe that this will stir the sisters up. If we are able to stir up the sisters, the husbands of at least half the sisters will be influenced to love the Lord. Hence, this also is a major service.
Cooperating in the Students’ Work
A third matter is the work with the students. This requires the sisters’ cooperation. We earnestly hope that several working saints will have homes near the gates of every university in Taiwan. When we preach the gospel on a campus, immediately after someone is led to salvation, we can bring him to one of these homes. In this way the homes will become homes for the young people. Whether or not students live at home, they like to be in other people’s homes. When we open our homes, the young people will be cherished. If the sisters receive this burden and are willing to cooperate, the result of our gospel work in the schools will be doubled. Hence, this also is a major item of the work. If the families can coordinate with the students’ work by rendering care to the students, it will be a great help to the work.
Learning to Be Spiritual Nursing Mothers
Fourth, the sisters should learn to be spiritual nursing mothers. As groups of young people are baptized, their parents may not be able to render them adequate shepherding. The young brothers and sisters will need spiritual mothers who have received a burden and who seek the Lord’s leading to help and lead them spiritually.
If the sisters can shepherd the young people in this way, it will be big help. This will give the young people an opportunity to turn to the Lord, since they will listen to what their spiritual mother says, even though they may not necessarily listen to what their parents say, Our care and love for them causes them to realize that what we do for them is from the Lord, and it will open their heart, making it easy for them to receive our words.
Many believers who were used by the Lord were saved and shepherded in homes. For example, George Müller, who established several orphanages, was not saved in a big meeting. He was saved in a gospel gathering in the home of a believer.
Hospitality
Finally, we hope that many sisters will open their homes for hospitality. Whenever there is a conference or a young people’s training, the sisters should open their homes to receive guests. The result of the opening of the homes for hospitality is rich and very profitable. Presently, we put the guests in the meeting hall, which lay be profitable, but we can hardly say that there is warmth or care.
The church in Los Angeles is an example. The out-of-town guests at the summer training-more than a hundred saints-are received into the homes of the saints. In 1963 we conducted the first training in Los Angeles, and a little over thirty trainees participated full time. The next year the number increased to about sixty. In both trainings the work arranged hospitality for the trainees. In 1965 we purchased a meeting hall, and the saints found homes near the hall. There were eighty to ninety saints living in the area around the hall. As a result, all the saints opened their homes for hospitality that year. Every home received two or three saints. All the saints as well as their guests participated in the training. Hence, before the evening meetings there were brothers and sisters everywhere around the meeting hall. People in America seldom walk on the street; they usually drive their cars. However, the saints who lived within walking distance from the hall did not go to the meetings by car; instead, with Bibles in hand they walked in threes and fives to the meetings. There were nearly one hundred visiting saints in that training, all of whom were received by the local saints. Hospitality gives people a deep impression, and it renders them much help. After the meetings, the saints returned to the homes, and the host families and the guests had further fellowship and prayer.
When the number of sisters in a church decreases, either the church is becoming weak, or the work with the sisters has problems. The sisters must rise up. In addition to the regular service of the church, they must actively take over the service of the five main items mentioned above. They should collect information cards for the sisters who are cold and backslidden or who have not been to a meeting for a long time and should care for these sisters according to the Lord’s leading. They should also make a list of all the families that have children and assign sisters to visit these families. The co-workers should also promote these matters in the churches and charge the sisters to rise up to take care of these things. Furthermore, the sisters should learn to be nursing mothers in shepherding the young brothers and sisters. (CWWL, 1967, vol. 1, “Serving in Coordination and Washing in Love,” msg. 11)
THE LEARNING FOR THE SISTERS
IN THEIR SERVICE
Being Persistent to Promote the Burden
The sisters who have a burden for the children should stand in the position of sisters with their heads absolutely covered. They should not take the lead or head up anything but only actively promote things. They can speak to the elders so that the elders who do not have a burden will become burdened over time. However, they should not depend on the elders for everything, because the elders will not be able to consider all the details. Instead, the sisters should pray over every matter, have a thorough fellowship among themselves, and then ask the elders to give the word to proceed. The sisters should not expect the elders to make all the arrangements or plan everything for them. The sisters can make plans and arrangements, but before implementing anything, they should bring their plans and considerations to the elders and ask the elders to examine and approve them. If the elders do not approve of a certain aspect of the arrangement, it should be dropped. The sisters should not do anything that has not been approved by the elders. This kind of fellowship and coordination will result in the elders becoming more burdened for the children’s work.
In the matter of service, the sisters should first promote their burden for the children to the brothers. The elders in a locality are often very busy, and they have many things to oversee. Consequently, it may take time for them to sense the growing burden for the children’s work. The sisters should wait for them on the one hand and be persistent to promote the burden on the other hand. Without the sisters’ persistence, the elders may not act, and the sisters may lose their zeal. Such a development would be regrettable. Hence, the sisters in every place must be persistent.
Not Assuming the Headship
but Leaving All Decisions to the Brothers
The service is quite precious when the sisters do not assume to be the head or take the lead, but, rather than being passive, are still persistent with the brothers. The sisters are actually the most capable. In the church there are two kinds of situations that are not good. In some churches the sisters do not do anything, because they think that the brothers should take the lead and also do what needs to be done. This is not a proper situation. In some churches, however, the sisters think that because they have been asked to serve, they should be given the full authority to decide everything. This is an appalling situation that can be the source of many problems in the church. For example, a sister may be asked to look after the sisters who have not been meeting regularly. Consequently, she may feel that she should stir them up at any cost. If the brothers agree with her way, she will do it, and if the brothers do not agree with her way, she will still do it. This will create problems. The most precious and valuable situation involves sisters who can actively undertake a task but have no opinions of their own.
Most of the sisters who followed the Lord in the Bible were burning within, but they did not have their own opinion, nor did they exercise any authority. They labored, but they did not take the lead. They were always persistent to put a little positive pressure on the brothers to take the lead. Today we truly need sisters who do not replace the brothers in the headship but who also do not expect the brothers to head up everything in a proper way. The sisters should be prepared. Even if the brothers are slow in taking the lead in some matters, the sisters should be persistent in promoting these matters to the brothers so that they will pick up the burden and take the lead. Although the sisters should never assume the headship or take the lead, they should never give up on the brothers or give them reason for rest. Even if the brothers are unhappy because of the sisters’ persistent pressure, the sisters should not be bothered by the brothers. Instead, the sisters should be able to diffuse the brothers’ displeasure and clear the air. The sisters who can do this are like the worthy -1?d woman whom King Lemuel spoke of in Proverbs 31, a woman who is able to build up her household (vv. 10, 27).
In certain matters the brothers may be slow and unclear, but when they make a decision, their decision is almost always correct. Most of the time the sisters are the first to have a sense concerning a matter; the brothers are indeed inferior. In sensing things and in seeing through and understanding things, the brothers are often not as good as the sisters. However, when it comes to making decisions, the sisters cannot be depended on. We all must learn this lesson.
Encouraging the Sisters to Exercise Their Sense
In the church life the brothers should be willing to receive the sense of the sisters. For example, if the sisters say that there is a need to preach the gospel, the brothers should catch up with their feeling concerning this. The sisters’ sense is quick and keen. However, when a decision must be made, we should never follow the sisters. This is my experience. The more the sisters know themselves, the more they realize that their sense is sharp, but they should not strive for the right to make decisions. Sisters should readily fellowship their feeling about a matter with the brothers, but then they should let the brothers make the decision. This is the secret of my work. I am very receptive to the sisters’ sense, but I let the brothers make the decision.
The sense of the sisters is very fine, this is an innate quality of the sisters. They have the ability to see the fine points of a matter much better than the brothers. Everything that the brothers cannot see, the sisters will see. Hence, the brothers should accept the sisters’ feelings and views quickly and should truly receive them. However, the brothers should bear the responsibility for making the decisions. The greatest mistake that the brothers can make is to either be unreceptive to the sisters’ feelings or follow the decisions of the sisters. This is most foolish.
In God’s creation the sisters are finer, keener, and deeper in their sense; the brothers cannot compare to them in this. The brother who is the finest in his sense is still coarse when compared to a sister. This is a matter of God’s creation. Hence, the brothers should quickly receive the sense of the sisters and encourage the sisters to exercise their sense. The more the sense of the sisters is exercised in the church, the better; but the sisters should not act independently. When it is time for a judgment or a decision, the sisters should stand back and allow the brothers to exercise their judgment. If the brothers are slow to make a decision, the sisters can be persistent, applying positive pressure so that the brothers make a decision. Eventually, the decisions made by the brothers will have a beneficial outcome. This way also protects and shields the sisters. There are unspeakable and countless benefits in taking this way.
Not Doing Anything That the Brothers
Have Not Yet Decided On
In conclusion, the sisters should come together to pray and fellowship and to seek the Lord’s leading as to how to present to the brothers their feelings concerning the needs in the church life. As the sisters “push” the brothers, the sisters should remember that they are sisters. Although they may be finer, more thorough, and deeper than the brothers in their sense, observation, and view, God never entrusts sisters with making decisions. Hence, the sisters must know their place. On the one hand, they should do their best to fellowship, to express their feeling, and to “push” the brothers, but on the other hand, the decision making should be left to the brothers.
The sisters should not do anything that the brothers have not yet decided on and agreed upon. Everything should pass through the brothers. If the brothers are slow, the sisters can apply a little pressure so that the brothers will become burdened. However, if the brothers do not agree or do not reach a decision, the sisters should not do anything. If we realize this principle, there will not be any problems. If we do not maintain this principle, the more the sisters do, the greater the problem will become. In the end, the church in that locality will suffer great loss. (CWWL, 1967, vol. 1, “Serving in Coordination and Washing in Love,” msg. 16)
GIVING THE SISTERS THE OPPORTUNITY TO DO THINGS
Hence, we must give the sisters the opportunity to do things; the more they do, the better. A decade ago I did not dare to say this, because I was concerned that the trend in society would be brought into the church and disrupt the proper order. However, the sisters have received many years of perfecting, and they have also been tested by many years of turmoil. We believe that the sisters know their position and their measure and are clear about the way of the Lord. Hence, we should give the sisters more opportunities to serve; we should instruct the sisters and cultivate their service so that they have more opportunities to function. (CWWL, 1967, vol. 1, “Serving in Coordination and Washing in Love,” msg. 11)
BECOMING A REAL HELP AND BLESSING
TO THE CHURCH
Some sisters do a very good job of serving their family at home. They know how to be wise at home, how to lead and strengthen the family, and how to put positive pressure on their husbands. In the same principle, if the sisters love the Lord and love the church as much as they love their families, they will be able to conduct themselves properly in the church and bear responsibilities, just as they do in their own homes. This will be a great help to the church. The church is a home, and it needs this kind of service; it needs a group of sisters who are good wives and loving mothers and who know how to bear responsibilities and yet not assume the position of the head. In other words, the church needs sisters who will not act on their own or make decisions on their own. When they encounter anything, they will handle it as they would in their own homes, letting their husbands make the decisions.
If the sisters see the brothers lagging behind in their sense of things, the sisters should not speak against them in an inappropriate way; rather, they should be patient and wise. This can be likened to a wife who knows how to deal properly with her husband at home. When a wife sees that her husband is upset, she will not continue to pressure him. After a couple of days, when she sees that his mood is better, she may speak of the matter with him again. Eventually, he will realize that she is the best wife. Similarly, the brothers who take the lead in the church will realize that the sisters love the Lord and the church very much and that they are very considerate of the brothers and helpful to them. Such sisters, who are good wives and loving mothers in the church, are a great blessing to the church. (CWWL, 1967, vol. 1, “Serving in Coordination and Washing in Love,” msg. 16)
Discussion:
1. How to perfect sisters to function in their proper position?
2. How to encourage sisters to participate in the practical services in the church?
3. How to arrange meetings and conferences for sisters?
