Lesson 7

Practical Points Concerning Shepherding

Scripture Reading: John 21:15-17; 1 Thes. 2:7, 11; Mark 10:42; 2 Tim. 2:24; 1 John 5:16; John 6:12; 2 Tim. 2:24

I. We all need to shepherd others in our daily life—John 21:15-17:

A. Shepherding is the most demanding need in the church—1 Thes. 2:7, 11; Gal. 4:19:

1. The sisters who are mothers know that nothing is as demanding as being a mother, for nothing and no one in the universe is as demanding as children—1 Thes. 2:7.

2. Similarly, nothing is as demanding as shepherding, not even gospel preaching; just as in child raising, everything related to shepherding is not up to us; it is up to the new ones; we cannot say that we have no time or that it is not convenient—v. 7.

B. Every member in the church has the normal ability to shepherd people—Eph. 4:11-12:

1. Some may argue that shepherding is a gift that not every brother or sister has; however, no one would say that raising children is a gift that some have and others do not; child raising is not a special talent but a talent given by birth—Matt. 25:20-23.

2. In the same way, by our spiritual birth every member in the church has the gift of shepherding; even someone who has been saved for only a few days can learn to shepherd—vv. 20-23.

C. In order to be the proper, normal members of the church in the Lord’s recovery, we need to build up a daily life of the gospel, and we need to go to the Lord for Him to show us who should be under our care of our shepherding; if these two matters are built up in the church, we will have a normal, proper church—John 15:4-5, 16; 21:15-17.

II. We need to see the following practical points concerning shepherding—John 6:12; James 1:19; 1 Cor. 3:6:

A. We need to not be quick, but should spend an adequate amount of time to shepherd people—v. 6.

B. We should be positive and not sloppy—Mark 6:39-40; John 6:12:

1. Although we should not be too quick, we must be very positive; very often, positive persons are quick ones, and slow persons are passive, even sloppy and uncaring.

2. We should not be too quick, but we must be positive and on time; to this end, we need much work of the cross on our disposition—v. 12.

C. We need to listen to others in order to realize their true need and real situation—cf. James 1:19:

1. This requires us to stop our own thought, concept, feeling, and speaking while we are shepherding them; we should be open to others and allow their situation to speak to us; this is not easy—Ezek. 1:11b-14.

2. We should allow those we are caring for to say something, try our best to understand them, and put ourselves in their place to understand their situation in the same way that they do—2 Cor. 12:18; 2:10.

D. We should visit others without saying much—cf. James 1:19:

1. This is the hardest lesson to learn in shepherding; the longer we wait to say something, the better it is—v. 19.

2. Because we all assume that we know so much, it is hard to say, “I don’t know”; Brother Nee taught us to say, “I don’t know” because, strictly speaking, we do not know much, and what we do know, we do not know thoroughly—5:12.

E. We should not make decisions for others; we need to be honest with the ones who are under our care, but we must still be restricted by the Lord not to make their decisions—cf. Matt. 20:25; Mark 10:42.

F. We should never argue with people, regardless of whether they are right or wrong; we must avoid the temptation to adjust others, convince them, or “sell” our good opinions and concepts—2 Tim. 2:24.

G. We should not pass on vain knowledge—cf. 1 Cor. 8:1:

1. People may ask us about many matters, but we must learn to exercise our spirit to discern the purpose of the questions—v. 1.

2. If we discern properly, we may realize that the questions are in vain; we must learn to be wise, not to be involved with questionings; this is also a difficult lesson for us all—Rom. 15:14.

H. We should not be involved in any negative talk; we must be in another realm, another kingdom—cf. Matt. 12:36; Eph. 4:31; 1 Pet. 2:1.

I. We should be honest and not political, answering honestly yes or no—cf. James 5:12.

J. Most importantly, we should minister life to others—1 John 5:16; cf. Prov. 15:4:

1. In order to do this, we ourselves must have life; we must have something before we can minister it to others; therefore, we must learn the lessons of life—1 John 5:16.

2. In fact, if we have life, there is no need to purposely minister life to others; life will already be ministered to them—1 Cor. 3:6; 2 Cor. 3:6.

3. All the foregoing points are a preparation for ministering life; if we do not have this preparation, whatever we do will only diminish our ministry and supply; if we are careful about all these items, we will remain in a pure condition to minister to others.

K. We need to take the lead to bring others into a prayer life—Eph. 6:18; Col. 4:2:

1. We need to pray with others and help them to pray—Acts 1:14.

2. We should not try to wrongly impress people that we have the way to do things, that we are smart, or that we know everything; rather, we should simply help people to put their trust in the Lord and depend on Him for everything—2 Cor. 1:8-9; Phil. 3:3.

3. To this end, we should bring with us a spirit and atmosphere of prayer to help others to come into a prayer life so that whatever happens to people, they will pray, look to the Lord, and rely on Him for His presence and clear leading—1 Tim. 2:1, 8.

L. We need to contact people with patience—cf. 1 Thes. 5:14:

1. We should not expect that someone who is newly saved or recovered will immediately be in a proper condition; we need patience and care for the weaker ones—2 Tim. 2:6.

2. A weaker one may require our patience to contact him again and again; this kind of continual, patient contact will shepherd people; this takes time, but there is nothing else we can do—James 5:7.

M. We need to trust those who are under our care—cf. 1 Thes. 5:25; 2 Thes. 3:1; 2 Cor. 1:8-11; Phil. 1:19; 2:1-2:

1. In one sense, we are the parents nourishing our children, but in another sense, we are all brothers and sisters; therefore, we should show others that not only do they rely on us, but we also rely on them—1 Thes. 5:25.

2. This mutual reliance creates much profit; it causes others to be open to us, trust us, and have confidence in us—2 Thes. 3:1.

N. We should never force anyone to do anything; we should not even try to overly influence people—cf. 1 Thes. 2:11:

1. In shepherding, we should stay away from every kind of forcing, coercing, and convincing.

2. We should allow people to have a free choice—Gen. 3:3.

O. We should fellowship with others according to our own experience—1 Thes. 2:11:

1. Paul told the Thessalonians, “Just as you know how we were to each one of you, as a father to his own children, exhorting you and consoling you and testifying” (1 Thes. 2:11); no doubt, Paul testified many things to the saints, but a great part of his testimony must have been his own experiences.

2. In a proper sense, whatever we render to help the younger ones should be from our own testimony; we must have a certain amount of experience of all of the foregoing detailed items—v. 11.

Excerpts from the Ministry:

SHEPHERDING BEING THE MOST DEMANDING NEED IN THE CHURCH

The sisters who are mothers know that nothing is as demanding as being a mother. Those who have never had children do not know the real meaning of demanding. Nothing and no one in the universe is as demanding as children. If an adult catches a cold, he may not ask for anything, but if a little one has a cold, he must be cared for. A mother can never ask for “sick leave.” Even if she is about to die, she must first take care of her child’s need. It is the same for fathers. A proper father must take care of his children’s demand. A child’s demand is without mercy. I have seen many young sisters who could not be adjusted by their father, mother, or even husband, but once they had children, they learned many lessons from these little ones (1 Tim. 2:15). Before they have children, some sisters do not practice to rise early in the morning. It seems that everything in their world is just right for sleeping late. After they have children, however, the little ones wake them up very early. Sometimes when I saw this, I wanted to commend the little children and say, “Very good! What no one else could accomplish for many years, you have done in only a few months.” Nothing is as demanding as shepherding, not even gospel preaching. Just as in child raising, everything related to shepherding is not up to us; it is up to the new ones. We cannot say that we have no time or that it is not convenient. This is for those under our care to decide.

EVERY MEMBER IN THE CHURCH

HAVING THE ABILITY TO SHEPHERD PEOPLE

The way of Christianity is to hire a pastor to shepherd a church. This is not what we mean by shepherding. Some may argue that shepherding is a gift that not every brother or sister has. However, no one would say that raising children is a gift that some have and others do not. Every parent, regardless of how smart or foolish he is, has a talent for raising children. Child raising is not a special talent; it is a talent given by birth. In the same way, by our spiritual birth every member in the church has the gift of shepherding. To say that we do not have the gift of shepherding is to annul our spiritual birth. Some think that because they are too young and are not pastors, elders, or experienced Christians, they cannot shepherd others. This is a wrong understanding and concept. We should forget the wrong teachings we received about shepherding. Someone may not know how to raise children, but when the children come, they are forced to learn. The parents of a young mother may think that she cannot raise her children, but the more they let her do her job, the more she will learn how to do it. We need to drop the wrong concept and pick up the proper one. Even someone who has been saved for only a few days can learn to shepherd…

A normal church is not merely one in which the members stand to speak something in the meetings. This is only a small part of our service. The main part of the service in the church is a daily gospel life and shepherding. Our concept must be regulated and radically changed. We should realize that it is a great lack and a shame not to bear fruit each year and have someone under our care. All the members in the churches should bear fruit and shepherd people all the time. If we build up these items, the church will be wonderful. The Lord’s way is always the best and wisest way. His way is to depend not on spiritual giants but on every member, on those who have a daily gospel life with shepherding. We all need a change of concept in this regard…

FIFTEEN PRACTICAL POINTS CONCERNING SHEPHERDING

Not Being Quick, but Spending an Adequate Amount of Time to Shepherd People

In order to adequately shepherd people, we must not be too quick. Our quick disposition needs to go. We cannot shepherd someone by speaking to them for only a few minutes. Therefore, we must be prepared to spend enough time with people.

Being Positive and Not Sloppy

Although we should not be too quick, we must be very positive. Very often, positive persons are quick ones, and slow persons are passive, even sloppy and uncaring. If a brother says, “Let us go to visit someone,” a passive one may say, “We should not be so quick. Let us wait for another two weeks.” However, if mothers care for their little ones in this passive way, their children will not survive. We should not be too quick, but we must be positive and on time. The secret of a good surgeon is not to be quick but to be positive and not lose any time. We all need to learn the best way. To this end, we need much work of the cross on our disposition. Anyone can do some amount of shepherding, but to have shepherding that is up to a proper standard, we should be very positive, though not too quick.

Listening to Others in Order to Realize

Their True Need and Real Situation

We must learn how to listen to others in order to realize their true need and real situation. This requires us to stop our own thought, concept, feeling, and speaking while we are shepherding them. We should be open to others and allow their situation to speak to us. This is not easy; it means that we must be positive but not quick. We should not say too much or make a decision too quickly. Rather, we should stop ourselves and listen to the person under our care, allowing him to say something, trying our best to understand him, and putting ourselves in his place to understand his situation in the same way that he does.

Many times our visiting damages people rather than helps them. It tears down rather than builds up. This is because we are too raw; we have never been “cooked.” Since we have never been dealt with adequately, we are still too wild. As long as we are raw and wild, we are able only to offend people, not to nourish them. Even if we nourish them to a certain extent, we may offend them to a greater extent, resulting in a net debit. We may feel that we have helped a brother, yet we do not realize that we tore him down even more. Eventually, this kind of shepherding produces a loss. Therefore, we all need to be dealt with. Some may say, “In this case, to be a brother or a sister in the local church is too hard. We simply want to go to the meeting on the Lord’s Day and enjoy ourselves for an hour by listening to the good singing and speaking. To shepherd people according to a high standard is too great a burden.” Yes, this is a burden, but we have no choice. In saying these things, it seems that I am a troublemaker, troubling myself first and then troubling others. However, according to Paul’s writings, he was a “troublemaker.” He gave himself no peace or rest in his care for the churches (2 Cor. 11:23b-28). He troubled himself, he troubled all the saints, and even today he troubles us. If we read his Epistles, we will all be troubled. The church life is a troubling life, but what other way can we take? We are destined to take this way. As human beings, we must believe in the Lord Jesus, and as believers, we have no choice but to take the way of the proper church life.

Visiting Others without Saying Much

We must also learn not to say too much when we visit people. This is the hardest lesson to learn in shepherding. The longer we wait to say something, the better it is. Someone may ask, “If we should not say anything, why should we contact anyone?” The secret is simply to contact them without saying much. If we speak too much, we will be like the friends of Job. This will waste our time and cause more problems. The best way to shepherd a person is to visit him without saying much. If he asks if we have anything to say, we can simply say, “Praise the Lord. Amen.” Over forty years ago some of us would go to Brother Nee and say, “Brother Nee, I have been invited by the church in a certain place. Please tell me what I should do?” He told us, “Do not do anything except this: Whenever they ask you something, you should say, ‘I don’t know.’” This answer truly bothered us. We said, “If this is the case, we do not need to go. If we do this, they will simply ask us to leave.” However, we eventually found that this fellowship rendered us the greatest help.

Because we all assume that we know so much, it is hard to say, “I don’t know.” Brother Nee taught us to say, “I don’t know” because, strictly speaking, we do not know much, and what we do know, we do not know thoroughly. We should not contact people in order to teach them. We ourselves have a greater need of teaching. We should go to the saints and to the churches to learn of them. We must not consider that we know more than they do. It is likely that they know more than we do. Those who went out to the churches without practicing Brother Nee’s principle eventually created many problems. The secret to contacting people is not to say much but to let them say something.

Not Making Decisions for Others

We should never make decisions for others. This is to consider that we are superior to them. We should not play politics. We need to be honest with the ones who are under our care, but we must still be restricted by the Lord to not make their decisions.

Never Arguing with People

We also should never argue with people, regardless of whether they are right or wrong. Every conversation is a temptation to adjust others, convince them, or “sell” our good opinions and concepts. We must avoid all these things. There is no need to do this. If we do, it will not help them.

Not Passing On Vain Knowledge

We must never pass on vain knowledge to people. People may ask us about many matters, but we must learn to exercise our spirit to discern the purpose of the questions. If we discern properly, we may realize that the questions are in vain. People often like to gain knowledge, asking about the elders, the brothers and sisters, and many other matters. We must learn to be wise, not be involved with questionings, and not pass on vain knowledge. This also is a difficult lesson for us all.

Not Being Involved in Any Negative Talk

We should not be involved in any negative talk. In other words, we should not be a “trash can.” Flies like to find a dirty place, but we must be clean and sterilized. If we do not visit people in a clean way, but rather take germs to them, they may be incited to open up in a wrong way. They will open their “tombs,” and death will come out. We should not get into any negative talk or answer any questions about negative matters. We must be in another realm, another kingdom.

Being Honest and Not Political

We must learn to be honest, never pretending and never playing politics. We should not be political in order to make the situation easier. We must be honest persons, answering honestly yes or no. If the situation does not allow us to answer yes or no, then we should not say anything. If we learn all these lessons, we will be able to care for others.

Ministering Life to Others

Most importantly, we must learn to minister life to others. In order to do this, we ourselves must have life. We may illustrate this with money. If we desire to give money to someone, we must first have some ourselves. If our pocket is empty, we have nothing to give. We must have something before we can minister it to others. Therefore, we must learn the lessons of life. Then we will know how to minister to others. In fact, if we have life, there is no need to purposely minister life to others. Life will already be ministered to them. When visiting others to take care of them, the proper principle is to minister life to them. All the foregoing points are a preparation for ministering life. If we do not have this preparation, whatever we do will only diminish our ministry and supply. If we are careless about any of these matters, our ministry of life will be annulled and swallowed up. If we are careful about all these items, we will remain in a pure condition to minister to others.

Taking the Lead to Bring Others into a Prayer Life

We need to pray with others and help them to pray. We should not try to wrongly impress people that we have the way to do things, that we are smart, or that we know everything. Rather, we should simply help people to put their trust in the Lord and depend on Him for everything. To this end, we should bring with us a spirit and atmosphere of prayer to help others to come into a prayer life. We need to create an atmosphere so that whatever happens to people, they will pray, look to the Lord, and rely on Him for His presence and clear leading. We need to build up those under our care with a prayer life. If we ourselves are not persons with a prayer life, we will not be able to build up others as this kind of person. We ourselves need to take the lead.

Contacting People with Patience

In order to care for others, we need patience. We should not expect that someone who is newly saved or recovered will immediately be in a proper condition. We need patience to care for the weaker ones. A weaker one may require our patience to contact him again and again. This kind of continual, patient contact will shepherd people. This takes time, but there is nothing else we can do. The church grows through shepherding. If we have gospel preaching without shepherding to take care of the new ones, many of the newly saved ones will fall away. This will spoil and damage our appetite for gospel preaching. Many will say, “We brought so many to the Lord, but most of them are not here anymore.” We will be like a family that has lost its children. Therefore, we need the proper shepherding for the proper child raising. It is impossible for only the leading brothers in a church to take care of the shepherding. Everyone must pick up the burden to take care of others. This requires our patience.

Trusting Those Who Are under Our Care

We must learn to trust and rely upon the ones who are under our care. This is to have a proper fellowship. In one sense, we are the parents nourishing our children, but in another sense, we are all brothers and sisters. Therefore, we should show others that not only do they rely on us, but we also rely on them. This mutual reliance creates much profit. It causes others to be open to us, trust us, and have confidence in us. This is to “open our veins for the blood to circulate.” All the members must be open to one another. Then the circulation will do its proper work. We have seen that some of the ones who are under our care do not open to us, regardless of how much time we spend with them. This means that they have no confidence in us. We need to behave in a way to build up a mutual confidence; this will cause them to open to us. This requires us to depend on them, rely on them, and show them that we need their help.

Never Forcing Anyone to Do Anything

We should never give anyone under our care the sense that we are forcing them to do anything. We must all learn the attributes of God. From the beginning, God never forced people. Rather, He gave them a free choice. We should not even try to overly influence people. Not to force or coerce people is contrary to our natural concept. In shepherding, however, we should stay away from every kind of forcing, coercing, and convincing. We should allow people to have a free choice.

Fellowshipping with Others

according to Our Own Experience

Whatever we fellowship with the dear ones must be according to our own experience. Paul told the Thessalonians, “Just as you know how we were to each one of you, as a father to his own children, exhorting you and consoling you and testifying” (1 Thes. 2:11). No doubt, Paul testified many things to the saints, but a great part of his testimony must have been his own experiences. We need personal experiences to be able to testify to the younger ones. In the proper sense, whatever we render to them as a help should be from our own testimony. How much we can testify in this way depends on how much we have experienced. We must have a certain amount of experience of all of the foregoing detailed items. The more we pick up the burden to shepherd others, the more things we will need to learn. (CWWL, 1973-1974, vol. 2, “The Normal Way of Fruit-bearing and Shepherding for the Building Up of the Church,” ch. 8, pp. 608-616)

References and Further Reading:

1. The Collected Works of Witness Lee, 1973-1974, vol. 2, “The Normal Way of Fruit-bearing and Shepherding for the Building Up of the Church,” ch. 8.